Latest Blonde Jokes

Most amazing collection of short hilarious latest blonde jokes with funniest videos and funny pictures that are good for all ages and apt for sharing at all gatherings.
blond jokes

Latest Blonde Driving Jokes

A blonde is speeding down a freeway when she is stopped by a highway patrol officer. The officer asks if he can see her driver's license. The blonde replies angrily, "I wish you guys would make up your minds! Just yesterday one of you took away my license, and now today you expect me to show it to you!"
dirty blonde jokes humor Contributed By: Rebecca Rose, Canada.

Blonde Jokes Clean - Friends In The Desert

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
blond joke Contributed By: Swong Arwaintga, Indonesia.

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Blonde Girl Jokes - At The Clinic

A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses. The Doctor directed her to read various letters with the left eye while covering up the right eye. The blonde was so mixed up on which eye was which, that the eye doctor, in disgust, took a paper lunch bag, cut a hole in it to see through, covered up the appropriate eye and asked the blond to then read the letters. As he did so, he noticed the blonde had tears streaming down her face. "Look," said the doctor, "there's no need to get emotional about getting Glasses." "I know," agreed the blonde, "But I kind of had my heart set on wire frames."
dirty blonde jokes Contributed By: Marina George, USA.

Blonde Hair Jokes - The Trapped Women

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away. The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died. The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died. The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.
short blonde jokes clean Contributed By: Stephen Gardinger, France.

Blonde Joke Of The Day

A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really bad Hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it To a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun with her. He told her to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out. So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into the tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she blew a little harder, and still nothing happened. Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?" The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out, but it wasn't working. The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "DUh!! Like Hello!! You need to roll up the windows first!"
two blondes jokes Contributed By: Sonia Janet, Argentina.

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Blonde Jokes Funny At The Football Game

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents." Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?" "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"
stupid blonde girl jokes Contributed By: Gerad Hammer, Poland.

Funny Clean Blonde Jokes - The Helpful Friend

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the next question correctly, she would win $1,000,000. If she answered incorrectly, she would pocket only the $32,000 milestone money. And as she suspected it would be, the million-dollar question was no pushover. The question was: "Which of the following species of birds does not build its own nest, but instead lays its eggs in the nests of other birds? Is it: A) the condor; B) the buzzard; C) the cuckoo; or D) the vulture?" The woman was on the spot. She did not know the answer. And she was doubly on the spot because she had used up her 50/50 Lifeline and her Audience Poll Lifeline. All that remained was her Phone-a-Friend Lifeline, and the woman had hoped against hope that she would not have to use it, mainly because the only friend that she knew would be home happened to be a blonde. But the contestant had no alternative. She called her friend and gave her the question and the four choices. The blonde responded unhesitatingly: "That's easy. The answer is C: The cuckoo." The contestant had to make a decision and make it fast. She considered employing a reverse strategy and giving any answer except the one that her friend had given her. And considering that her friend was a blonde, that would seem to be the logical thing to do. On the other hand, the blonde had responded with such confidence, such certitude, that the contestant could not help but be persuaded. "I need an answer," said the host. Crossing her fingers, the contestant said, "C: The cuckoo." "Is that your final answer?" asked the host. "Yes, that is my final answer." replied the contestant. The host said: " That answer is.........absolutely correct !! You are now a Millionaire!" Three days later, the contestant hosted a party for her family and friends including the blonde who had helped her win the million dollars. "Jenny, I just do not know how to thank you," said the contestant. "Because of your knowing the answer to that final question, I am now a millionaire. And do you want to know something? It was the assuredness with which you answered the question that convinced me to go with your choice. By the way--- how did you happen to know the right answer?" "Oh, come on !" said the blonde. "Everybody knows that cuckoos don't build nests. They live in clocks !"
bad blonde jokes for kids Contributed By: Myra Trott, Australia.

The Blonde Story At The Office

There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, "I've had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals." One of the guys, of course, said, "I don't believe you. What is the capital of Nevada?" "N," she answered.
good funny blonde quotes jokes Contributed By: Carlos Spencer, Spain.

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Dumb Blonde Jokes Clean On Car Parking

One winter morning a couple was listening to the radio over breakfast. They hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street,so the snowplows can get through." Norman's wife goes out and moves her car. A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through." Norman's wife goes out and moves her car again. The next week they ! are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park ......" Then the power goes out. Norman's wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her face she says, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?" With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to blondes exhibit, Norman says ... "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"
short blonde funny jokes Contributed By: Ronda Louise, Mexico.

Jokes Blonde Funny On Painting

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
really funny blonde hair jokes Contributed By: Denis Lionne, Switzerland.

Blonde Girl Jokes At The Shopping Mall

A blonde got lost in her car in a terrible snow storm. She remembered what her dad had once told her, "If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wait for a snow plow and follow it." Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for about forty-five minutes. Finally, the driver of the truck got out and asked her, "What are you doing?" She explained, "My Dad told me, 'if you ever get stuck in a snowstorm , follow a snow plow.'" The driver nodded and said: "Well, I'm done with the Wal-Mart parking lot. Want to follow me over to K-Mart?"
funny blonde joke of the day Contributed By: Josphina Albuquerque, Portugal.

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The Blonde Story - Impressive

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.
clean blonde sayings jokes Contributed By: Rony Johnson, Jamaica.

Short Two Blondes Jokes

Two blondes were taking a trip to visit Disneyland. On the way they saw a sign that said "Disneyland Left" They both started to cry.
sexy funny clean blonde jokes Contributed By: Linday Rayburn, Scotland.

Blonde Jokes For Kids - The Grown ups

A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I’m a six foot tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is six foot two, weighs 225, and he’s a rugby player. The fella to your right is six foot five, pushing 300, and he’s a wrestler. Each one of us is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind guy says, “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times."
funniest jokes blonde videos Contributed By: Denver Wrigley, Iceland.

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Funny Blonde Quotes And Blonde Sayings - Q & A

Q: Why do blondes take the pill? A: So they know what day of the week it is.
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up? A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
Q: What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common? A: They're both empty from the neck up.
Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License? A: Because she got an "F" in sex.
Q: What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes? A: She sticks it in the microwave!
Q: Why did God give blondes 2 more brain cells than horses? A: So they don't shit in the parade.
Q: What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear? A: Data transfer.
Q: What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel.
Q: Why are blondes bad at Hide and Seek? A: Because they can never find the sausage.
Q: Why did the Blonde go to the Apple Store? A: She wanted a Big Mac meal.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde corn maze? A: It only had 1 stalk.
Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird? A: She threw it off a cliff.
Q: Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours? A: Because it said 'concentrate'.
Q: What do you call 10 blondes at the bottom of a pool? A: Air Pockets.
Q: What has 12 feet and an IQ of 40? A: A Blonde-tourage.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath? A: She still hasn't gotten all the hair off her tongue.
Q: Why can't the blonde write the number eleven? A: She didn't know which "1" came first!
Q: What goes: vroooom-schreech, vrooom-schreech, vroooom-schreech? A: A blonde at a flashing red light.
Q: Did you ever hear about the blonde who bathed herself and drank cleaning substances? A: She wanted to be spotless inside and out.
Q: Why did the blonde put sugar on her bed? A: Because she wanted sweet dreams!
Q: Why did the blonde take a ruler to bed? A: Because she wanted to measure how long she slept.
Q: What do you call an eternity? A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.
Q: How do you sink a submarine full of blondes? A: Knock on the door.
Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes? A: Toes Go In First.
Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms? A: They think their picture is being taken.
Q: Why do blondes make bad bank robbers? A: Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.
Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimer's disease? A: Her IQ goes up!
Q: How do you change a blonde's mind? A1: Blow in her ear. A2: Buy her another beer.
Q: What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear? A: "Thanks for the refill!"
Q: Why did the Blonde go to Taco Bell? A: To pay her phone bill.
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted!
Q: What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? A: She moved.
Q: Why did the blonde take a camera to bed? A: To record what she was going to dream that night.
Q: Why don't blondes get coffee breaks? A: It takes too long to retrain them.
Q: What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty? A: A blonde parade.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to see where the sun went? A: It finally dawned on her!
Q: What do you say to a blonde that won't come home with you? A: "Have another beer."
Q: Why did the blonde only tie one shoe? A: Because on the bottom it said "Taiwan" (Tie one).
Q: How do you drown a blonde? A: Tape a mirror to the bottom of a pool.
Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Give her a gun and say it's a hair drier.
Q: What happened to the blonde Ice Hockey Team? A: They drowned in Spring Training.
Q: Why were there 6 bullet holes in the blondes mirror? A: She tried to kill her self.
Q: Why was the blonde woman talking into an envelope? A: She was trying to send a voice mail!
Q: How many dumb blonde jokes are there? A: None there all true...
Q: Why did the blonde eat a dictionary? A: Because she wanted to be smart.
Q: Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency? A: They can't remember the number.
Q: What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it? A: A thought.
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? A: Run like hell, she has a grenade in her hand.
Q: How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves? A: She fell out of the tree.
A blonde and a brunette were jumping off a building. Who jumped first? The brunette. The blonde had to ask for directions.
The advantage of having a blonde as your girlfriend is that you can park in the handicap zone.

dumb blonde jokes clean funny Contributed By: Nelly Rooney, Panama.

Best Expressions On Blonde Jokes

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bad blonde joke of the day Blonde stereotypes square measure stereotypes of blond haired of us, significantly women, and its sub-types of blonde bombshell and dumb blonde. Blondes square measure otherwise unimaginative from brunettes as further fascinating and fewer intelligent. There square measure many blonde jokes created on those premises. tho' aforementioned jokes square measure primarily aimed toward women, there area unit blonde stereotypes usually involving men. Appreciation for staying away from blonde jokes dirty and dishing out some clean cool stuff. Lucy Phineas, Israel.

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short blonde funny jokes On the other hand, a blonde girl is typically perceived as making little or no use of intelligence and as a "woman World Health Organization depends on her look rather than on intelligence." At identical time, of us tend to presume that blondes area unit less serious-minded and fewer intelligent than brunettes, as reflected in "blonde jokes". The roots of this notion is additionally derived to Europe, with the "dumb blonde" in question being a French paramour named Rosalie Duthé, satirized throughout a 1775 play Les curiosities Delaware la Foire for her habit of pausing AN extended time before speaking, showing not alone stupid but nearly dumb (in the sense of mute). The latter stereotype of "dumb blonde" is exploited in blonde jokes. In Brazil, this extends to blonde women being looked down upon, as reflected in sexist jokes, as together sexually impure. Adding a few funny blonde quotes would really enhance the value of this page. Shirley Monroe, Brazil.

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sexy blonde jokes dirty A blonde bombshell is also a gender stereotype that connotes a awfully participating woman with blonde hair. The blonde bombshell is one all told the foremost notable and consistently fashionable female character varieties in cinema. many showbiz stars have used it to their advantage, still as Jean Harlow, actress, actress, Jayne Mansfield, Brigitte Bardot and Mamie author. A review of Germanic tabloids from the U.K. has shown it to be a revenant blonde stereotype, beside "busty blonde" and "blonde babe". The blonde joke of the day made my visit complete as it is truly humorous and hilarious. Ivana Rabzoky, Russia.

funniest two blondes videos Jean Harlow started the stereotype together with her film Bombshell. Following her, Monroe, Mansfield and author helped establish the stereotype typified by a combination of shapely physique, very light hair and a perceived lack of intelligence. throughout the 19 Fifties, the blonde bombshell began to switch the woman as a result of the thought media stereotype. Marjorie Rosen, the student of women in films, says of the two high blonde bombshells of the time that "Mae West, terminating vocal salvos with autocratic assurance, and Jean Harlow, mercantilism her physical attract for the heaps, reworked the construct of passive female sex into associate degree aggressive statement of fact". In 1993, Sharon Stone hosted a documentary regarding Jean Harlow, Harlow: The Blonde Bombshell. Some of the blonde jokes funny mentioned here are very absorbing and worth sharing with others. Rafael Soares, France.

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very funny dirty blonde jokes A gettable clarification is that attractive women have less pressing incentives to cultivate and demonstrate their intellect thus on ensure their future, since attractiveness is Associate in Nursing quality, or correlatively that intelligent women have less pressing incentives to dye their hair to a possible attractive color. The validity of this clarification is verified by its relevancy to a regular generality of the "dumb athlete" stereotype. The dumb blonde stereotype (and the associated psychological feature bias) may have some negative consequences and it's going to injury a blond person's career prospects. The jokes blonde story of the day is that this site will go a long way towards encouraging clean entertainment. Sandra Jaffery, Turkey.

funny short blond jokes Gentlemen like Blondes (a comic novel, a street musical, and a couple of films) explores the attractiveness of blonde women. The reference work of Hair describes Marilyn Monroe's blonde role as that of "a fragile woman World Health Organization relied on her look rather than on intelligence—what some people ask as 'dumb blonde'." At constant time, at intervals the film she demonstrates a precise amount of wit regarding her life position expressed in her hit "Diamonds square measure a girl's best friend". Madonna emulated that screen-persona of Monroe in her music video Material woman. I like all the dumb blonde jokes clean that are published on this site and my appreciation to the whole team. Rodney Samson, Philipines.

comedy dirty blonde jokes Many blonde actresses have contend unimaginative "dumb blondes", furthermore as Monroe (dyed blonde), Judy Holliday, Jayne Mansfield (dyed blonde Carol Wayne and Goldie Hawn, best known as the happy "dumb blonde", weaving over her lines, notably once she introduced European mountain ash & Martin's Laugh-In "News of the Future". at intervals the yank broadcast Three's Company the blonde woman (originally Chrissy contend by Suzanne Somers, and later Cindy and Terri) is good and naïve, whereas the brunette (Janet contend by author DeWitt) is smart. The blond jokes have been a great hit among the younger generation since its inception. Danielle Solomon, Japan.

silly best blonde jokes There is a category of jokes cited as "blonde jokes" that employs the dumb blonde stereotype. It overlaps sometimes with completely different jokes that portray the subject of the joke as promiscuous and/or stupid. Some blonde jokes settle for sexual humour to portray or stereotype their subjects as promiscuous. many of these unit rephrased lodge woman or Essex woman jokes, much like completely different jokes regarding dumb blondes unit supported long-running ethnic jokes. many of these jokes unit mere variants on ancient ethnic jokes or jests regarding completely different re knowable groups (such as Italian jokes involving Carabinieri, Sardarji jokes or Pathan jokes). Similar jokes regarding typical minorities have circulated since the seventeenth century with alone the phrasing and targeted groups changed. The dirty blonde jokes somehow out score all other categories of this type of jokes as people love anything related to their sexuality. Terence Lincoln, California.

funny blonde jokes clean Blonde jokes are criticized as sexist by several authors, as most blondes in these jokes are female, although male variations in addition exist. In fact, dumb blonde jokes are overwhelmingly female-specific: in step with associate thorough search in varied publications and on the net, concerning sixty 3 of dumb blonde jokes are directed alone at females (compared to less than baseball game that directly documented dumb blond men). analysis indicates that as a results of this, men report being happy by blonde jokes significantly over women do. Research has however shown that the best blonde jokes need not be related to sex but can be in any other category. Maggie De Lima, Mexico.

funny two blondes jokes The actual indisputable fact that in most of these jokes the target is invariably unintelligent, female and sexually promiscuous makes them even tons of sexist. among the 20 the century, a class of meta-jokes concerning blondes (i.e. jokes concerning blonde jokes) has emerged. terribly} very typical plot of this type a blonde complains concerning the unfairness of the stereotype propagated by blonde jokes, with fun line very reinforcing the stereotype. The fun of enjoying blonde jokes clean is something one has to experience with the right mind set. David Afleck, Bermuda.

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